Relationship series (7) Love and Human Aesthetics, entry (1)

Completed 15 Dec 2010

Greetings and welcome... It's been several months since my last "Relationship Series" blog, having dedicated most of my writing and poetry specifically to the topic of Twin Souls. This particular entry is one that I had posted back in April and deactivated it to make modifications that I am just now getting around to doing. As always, it is my intention to provide my readers with more than information! My goal is to REACH OUT and stimulate "Thought Processes" that result in an increase of "Working Knowledge" of the topics I address.

To the potential in each human life as it ripples from its origin... may the waters be clear in the learning, and the currents warm with love and grace.
Truly, Thomas


The goal of this first entry on love and human aesthetics will be to lay the groundwork toward understanding physical beauty as it pertains to contemporary human behavior in a spiritual context. Contained within this format, significant emphasis will be placed on both positive and negative aspects of the conversation. Ultimately, my objective will be to show that through a greater understanding of this complicated issue, we can maximize the positives and grow past many of the associated negative manifestations; manifestations that stifle progress, create confusion, destroy relationships and block loving intimacy for many loving caring people who just want to be happy. The culmination of the listed resource links along with the authors mentioned aid me in providing the comprehensive framework intended to meet this issue at the Soul level...

My first mention is to that of Caroline Myss' work with archetypes and sacred contracts. Her work has impacted the lives of millions of people including my own. Her books and center-stage working models are life-changing tools. Tools that provide a powerful understanding that teaches us how to deal with the most intricate complexities of daily life!! I have studied the materials of several people I consider to be my spiritual masters--- Caroline's models are among the most powerful I've come across--- they will be explained and used foundationally within this conversation... Gary Zukav's work with the Earth School metaphor also fits well.  

As I move through this study it will be important to have a basic understanding of Archetypes and Sacred Contracts. In short, a Contract is the Soul work or spiritual evolution we agreed to engage mastery over before we came to inhabit the bodies we now live in. I discussed this concept in length when I talked about Gary Zukav's Earth School earlier this year in another blog: ( http://heartsseeker22.blogspot.com/2010/02/knowing-ones-place-in-continuum-of.html ). An Archetype is a template or Code of your spiritual DNA. Just think of it as the language of the SOUL or those things in life that you attract (positive or negative) that are in the ALWAYS category. In regard to aesthetics and human beauty, many people who have archetypes that resonate deeply with the subject will just identify naturally; in other words, they resonate because its in their spiritual DNA. 

By taking the time to not only gain an understanding of the subject matter, but also expand that understanding as it interacts with the DNA strands of our SOUL, that is, through understanding our archetypes, we not only help ourselves, but we move toward a spiritual wholeness that moves beyond the five senses...

From a physical plane perspective, I have read and would agree that we are ALL ARTISTS in some way, which means that unless we are on some kind of life support with no brain activity, we have a measure of aesthetic taste. In regard to so called "human beauty," it is no social secret that tall handsome articulate men and women who reflect "Hollywood standards" receive more opportunities for advancement in "The Corporate World." As we see in the documentary "America the Beautiful" by Darryl Roberts, much of the human "PSYCHE" regarding beauty and human aesthetics is out-of-balance...

http://americathebeautifuldoc.com/

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/darryl-roberts/the-ugly-truth-about-amer_b_121153.html

So if you've taken the time to digest the gist of Darryl's work, I ask, where does human beauty find balance in the contemporary global community? I don't believe Darryl Roberts or anyone else would advocate that an artist learn to paint without color. Furthermore, I believe that there is more than one side of the issue here. In other words, it could be inferred that Darryl Roberts is indicating that ALL women who wear make-up are doing so as a result of negative influences that directly effect their decision making. To put it in an exaggerated sentence... "women wear make-up because they are not emotionally, or psychologically strong enough to go without it."

I agree with much of what Darryl is doing, and I do support his efforts; however, I am also saying that viewers of his material may have cause for an opposing view... For me, I believe that many of the negatives Darryl points out are serious issues of great social importance, especially for our youth, but I also strongly believe that there are some women who actually like to wear make-up. That said, I do recommend watching Darryl's documentary prefaced with the comment that as both an artist and a naturalist, it makes no difference to me if a woman wears make-up or not. I find equal beauty in both... On a personal note, the woman I was married to for 29 years never wore makeup a day in her life--- it remains to this day one of the things I respect most about her because it was HER decision!! Everything circles back to personal preference, and at the end of the day, whether man or woman, true beauty comes ONLY from within...

Ok, so what can we learn about beauty from a historical context? Currently, I am working my way through Homer's Iliad which was venerated by the ancient Greeks. The words and phrasing that Homer uses in describing both men and women of beauty is really no different then the words or phrasing that we use today. To illustrate this point, take a look at the link below; these stories are from ancient China. In contemplation, I think you will agree that for the most part, things have not changed much...
http://www.chinatown-online.com/cultureeye/common/four.htm

We are all somewhere on the scale of aesthetic taste, and IT JUST IS WHAT IT IS!!!!!!  The balance is in YOU and its in ME. From what I have discovered so far in my search for balance, it seems that there are just some people that are more aesthetically "Connected" than other's. Does that make connecting or not connecting--- one better than the other? Of course not!! If someone is an expert linguist, wine taster, musician with exquisite talent putting them in a 2% category of God given emotional "connection" does that make them better or worse than the other 98%? We all know the answer, and as we ponder that point, I want to merge the answer into Caroline Myss' model of archetypes in order to connect both the spiritual and human elements...

In one of the links below ("I love my husband, but I'm not attracted to him), there is a woman who deeply respects her husband, but he is not fulfilling her needs, and because she is becoming less physically attracted to him, she is finding her mind fantasizing about other men (see Dr. Saltzman link). My point in mentioning this particular story is to begin to connect aesthetics to relationships and archetypes. As you will see from this story, she loves her husband but she is just unhappy and deeply unfulfilled. There seems to be a connection (more study needed) to the strength / measure of one's libido to the human aesthetic connection; what I believe is needed (present company included) is a level of spiritual awareness / equanimity that equips the individual for emotional and psychological balance. Caroline's (as well as Gary Zukav') models / applied disciplines---- pave the way...

Using Caroline's model of "Contracts" toward this unhappy couple, we could look at the possibility that the negatives manifested by their lack of intimacy are "opportunities" to grow spiritually. In other words, they would have set up this arrangement prior to being born in order to learn a lesson, or master an important life-lesson that goes beyond ego, and powerful primal instincts. We could also say that the life-lesson that was set up was that of this woman finding her own power which may result in her leaving the relationship. There could be a number of different scenarios. Within my beloved studies of Twin-Souls, it would imply the idea of a karmic relationship. Regardless of the "Contractual Agreement," it would ALWAYS (in the threesome of Caroline Myss, Gary Zukav and Twin Soul spirituality) mean opportunity for personal empowerment and spiritual growth!

To expand the conversation further,  I would like to now focus on two words; the first is the Greek word Pronesis, and the second, the Navajo word, Hozho. Pronesis is a word we studied in philosophy. Metaphorically, it describes someone who does the right thing at the right time, under the right circumstances, and for the right reasons... Secondly, the Navajo word Hozho came to my awareness just this morning from Ruth Gendler's book I started reading called "Notes on the Need for Beauty: An Intimate Look at an Essential Quality." Ruth illustrates to that "hozho, translated into English as 'beauty,' also means harmony, wholeness, goodness" (Gendler 7).

Additionally, in regard to being responsible in human relationships  Don Miguel Ruiz talks about this in his book "The Mastery of Love." He candidly discusses the ethical dynamics associated with walking away, the rewards of staying, and the responsibilities of being true to yourself and honoring/respecting your partner, dynamics which are at the heart of many  of our "Earth-Bound" relationships. As an expansion of the spiritual component of this conversation, I specifically mention Earth-Bound relationships, to illustrate our status of eternal SOULS in Earth-Bound bodies. If we could magically eliminate ALL of the negativity that comes with being human (i.e., judgements of self and others saturated with clouded vision precipitated by social conditioning, ego and delayed spiritual healing...), we would not be having this discussion; however, that is not the case.

It remains then that after we absorb the whole of this conversation that the hard questions are not easily answered; questions such as, where is the balance between actions based on reason and respect, and actions based in fear? Where do the tragedies end? What are the responsibilities we have as individuals? What are the inherent human tendencies associated with aesthetics? The following links will help me further illustrate some of the groundwork to the answers. I think you will find Dr. Saltzman's work of particular significance with his contributions on understanding the limitations of the "English" word LOVE!!

Note: It is my belief that each of us wants and deserves to be shown compassion and cared for as individuals. Personally, as a young boy, I watched my mother wilt away from being a beautiful woman, to skin and bones before she succumbed to her disease. I mention this, because I believe that two of the archetypes I've been dealing with as an adult are the wounded and the abandoned child. To help myself and others further, my future entries on the topic of human love and aesthetics will continue to integrate more dialog from teachers, healers, and other professionals who have made an impact toward human awareness, and the spiritual / philosophical psychology of understanding wholeness in relationships. This awareness and wholeness I speak of is one that incorporates the basic human concepts that, "at the end of the day" we ALL just want to be loved because the universe is LOVE, and that its not JUST about physical AESTHETICS and Hormones!! I look forward to continuing the discussion... Love and Blessings, Thomas


"Can a relationship work if you're not attracted to your partner? Can you still be in love with him/her?"
http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/63251

"Looking Good: The Psychology and Biology of Beauty"
http://www.jyi.org/volumes/volume6/issue6/features/feng.html

"Why I Hate Beauty" From Psychology Today:
http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200107/why-i-hate-beauty

What is Ugly? by Anthony Synnott, Ph, D.              http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/rethinking-men/200907/what-is-ugly

"I love my husband but I am not attracted to him" From Ask dr-robert:
http://askdrrobert.dr-robert.com/sex%20v.%20love.html

"ask dr-robert"--a psychologist replies to questions about problems in living--hosted by Dr. Robert Saltzman, Ph.D.



Authors mentioned and their websites
Caroline Myss: http://www.myss.com/
Gary Zukav:  http://garyzukav.wwwhubs.com/
don Miguel Ruiz: http://www.miguelruiz.com/
Ruth Gendler: http://www.ruthgendler.com/

Twin Souls / Twin Flame Resource guide

This morning I finished reading Twin Souls written by Particia Joudry and Maurice Pressman; In keeping to my previous outline, I will be submitting my book review in my "What is Spirituality?" Blog.

I am posting this resource link here because, as with my first introduction to the twin flame concept, it remains one of the absolutely most important and significant "Spiritual" concepts I have EVER studied.

*** Content below intended to be filtered through the filter of your own personal evolution, for I do understand that the life-path for each of us is unique & special****

Please, if you are surfing the "Dating Scene" and have been hurt in the past; PLEASE take an emotional step back, or at least take a look at what this concept has to offer. ESPECIALLY if you believe in reincarnation. Trust me, you will not be sorry you did!!! More to come...

Truly, Love and Blessings!! Thomas

PS: 2 of the 3 books I've read on the subject are listed in the link below. I will be starting on my 4th directly after completing my blog on the Joudry / Pressman book

http://www.twinflames-twinsouls.net/books_&_films.htm

Link Added 7/3/2011
I have added the below link as a resource and wish to add the comment that in the path of  "Soul Evolution" its not always about what we "WANT" but what we came here to accomplish. The path of a "Soul Mate" as Tonya illustrates here can be difficult; however, if YOUR SOUL has reached a point of evolution where this "Soul Mate" has come into your life, it may be EXACTLY what you signed up for before incarnating in this lifetime. That my dear friends is HUGE!!! Blessings... Thom

http://www.tonyasomers.com/finding-my-soulmate.htm

Related Blogs:

http://universalallegory.blogspot.com/   Ancient Teaching: Understanding Twin Souls / Twin Flames
http://heartsseeker22.blogspot.com/    The blog I started to begin my search for understanding intimate relationships
http://inspirationsofhumanity.blogspot.com/ A blog profiling and honoring Human Inspration
http://heartmatesforever.blogspot.com/  Poetry of Alchemy
http://empathyandpain.blogspot.com A blog I started in honor of my mother

Twin Flames discussion moved to "What is Spirituality??"

Since discovering the topic of Twin-Flames several weeks ago, I've made the decision to move the conversation within a "Spiritual" context. Briefly, there is no other place that the conversation can be advanced from my perspective, as inherent to the teaching itself, a purely "Spiritual" existence defines its essence!


Related Blogs:

http://universalallegory.blogspot.com/ Ancient Teaching: Understanding Twin Souls / Twin Flames
http://heartsseeker22.blogspot.com/ The blog I started to begin my search for understanding intimate relationships
http://inspirationsofhumanity.blogspot.com/ A blog profiling and honoring Human Inspration
http://heartmatesforever.blogspot.com/ Poetry of Alchemy
http://empathyandpain.blogspot.com/ A blog I started in honor of my mother

Have a blessed day!
Tom

Relationship Series (8) "A Book, A Bottle and A Battle on a Lonely Evening" followed by an Introduction to the Term "Twin Flames"

Expanded 3/31/10

Over the years during the course of topical and casual discussion, I've been told by more than one person: "You think too much!" Well, I admit that there are probably not very many people in the world who have been known to create personal "life journals" complete with categorical indexes and marker tabs... Go ahead and chuckle, I don't mind; God knows I've become accustom to being grouped into the category called "different." Effectively, I will then let this entry stand as another categorical marker tab in my ongoing collection of topical information on relationships, and the study/belief systems of those who have come before us/dwell with us...


On Friday evening 3/26 while I was listening to my new audio book "Even the Stars Look Lonesome" by Maya Angelou, my thoughts drifted back to Composition 100 where we were introduced to various authors in our reading/writing assignments. One of my favorites was/is Willa Cather; our professor told us that there are few authors who capture and articulate the true essence of "life" in their writing, and that Willa was one of the finest. "My point is that I have now added Maya Angelou to my personal list of authors who have been given the wonderful gift and ability of touching our lives through their writing (hearing her read the book is wonderful too); the last time I was privileged to tap-in to this marvelous resonance was when I read Lauren Slater's incredible book "Welcome to My Country: A therapist's memoir of madness." A bit of a deviation from the main topic, but I do recommend the readings...

So, on to the task of explaining the connection here between my new audio book to this entry: Well, late last week when I emotionally removed one of my blogs for modification, I had done so with the belief that I had written too close to the line of my level of "acceptability in sharing." Specifically, information pertaining to other people that is not mine to share; again, I apologize for what I perceive to be a crossing of that line, and what Aristotle would call a crossing of the mean. Actually, at that particular moment, I wondered if it would be best to just delete this whole blog thing and get on with expressing myself in other ways. You see, the air had been getting heavy with emotion earlier in the week with a certain date on the calendar getting closer to me with each passing hour; a historically significant date that marked a pivotal time in my spiritual/relational life! As the week wore on I found myself sinking deeper into its grasp of loneliness. The significance of Maya's audio book was that the thought ( the idea) of listening to it was popping into my consciousness simultaneously with another recurring thought that had been following me during the day; that being the idea of stopping at the liquor store on the way home from work to get a bottle of something to ease the pain. For a time, it seemed a toss-up as to which contestant for my attention would win out, the bottle, my continued loneliness, or the audio book.

Now I should probably mention having written the last couple of sentences, that the amount of alcohol consumed within the confines of this home since I began keeping my own company last summer (first two days alone excluded, then the drain in the kitchen sink took over consumption duties) would hardly be enough to fill a thimble, and I don't do the bar scene (having spent much of my youth on a bar stool along side my late father); therefore, it remains speculative at best as to the probability of my actually stopping the car to purchase another $100.00 bottle of scotch; the remainder of which found its way down that kitchen drain along with several subordinates some months ago... Now as far as my week was concerned, if a category could be created called "an emotionally taxing week" and then a measurement could be assigned to it in terms of effect, mine would have qualified for measurement! Of course, instead of listening to the audio book, there were a hundred and one other things I could have done with my time, but the situational dynamics between the emotions, the audio book, and the bottle became illuminated as a moment of personal clarity and decision. It was one of those moments where you know that you alone are the one who has to choose, and that choice has been given to you from somewhere within your spirit; call it divine illumination, call it "been down that road before", call it, you've handled it this far, you can make it, call it the influence of an angel, or perhaps a prayer from some unknown source...

The point in the "story" shall we say, is that in the process of choosing/listening to Maya's story, I was able to find a much needed/desired dose of encouragement and direction. Listening to Maya read about the ups and downs of her life did not make my loneliness go away, but it did help put things in perspective. She is a tremendously articulate and passionate person, and I am blessed for having had the opportunity to share my evening with her. As a byproduct, I've also chosen to stay the course of blogging as well. Now for those who have been following me with any regularity, my revision process is sometimes several days before I feel I have captured the "essence" of what I want to illustrate, so I appreciate your patience with my subtle and sometimes not so subtle revisions.

I have co-titled this particular blog entry "Introduction to the term Twin Flames" as another categorical component within the Romantic Relationship realm. As always, woven into any of the topics I choose to illustrate, I seek a greater understanding of the information. In the case of the soul-mate/twin-flame elemental content, I am a relative newcomer by virtually ALL accounts. Having said this, and having done my preliminary research on the topic, I stand absolutely "AMAZED" that not one of the people I have come in contact with over these last several years, i.e., those who I know have studied a multitude of esoteric beliefs had not apparently either heard of, or mentioned to me something as categorically significant as the phrase twin-flames!! Equally amazing is the fact that I had never heard of it in my personal studies until just recently when I came across the term while googling research on "soul-mates." But it was not until a couple of days ago when I actually started researching the topic that I began to realize something very powerful was unfolding! Now it would be fair to say that most people have used the term soul-mate on a social level, but "most people", like myself, possess only the surface knowledge that comes with the term. That's why I love research, it is a learning tool all in itself, and every once in a while you come across a gold nugget. Now I know what an archaeologist must feel like when they find an artifact, and based on what I have discovered in my preliminary studies of the topic, my words are not spoken lightly!

This concept is beyond incredible!! Even a surface adhering to the inherent meaning of this belief system would mean a significant restructuring of what a "spiritually conscious" person would want to achieve in a relationship, or at the very least, the illumination of what they are suppose to achieve (Soul work) in the one they are in! Even from a conceptual standpoint, the personal responsibility/phronesis, and personal growth potential involved within the Twin-flame "mindset" would yield the power to solve a multitude of global social issues, and would probably cut the divorce rate in half!

The Twin-flames concept certainly fits well with the teachings of Gary Zukav and Linda Francis in their book "Heart of the Soul." Needless to say, the concept now has my attention, and without a doubt warrants further research. I look forward to understanding the historical components of the concept; indeed, this will also fit nicely into my ongoing study of Aristotle's "ethics."


In keeping with my commitment to provide depth and diversity, the following links provide a variation of thought:










Expanded thought on Twin-Flames and Soul mates:

http://www.soulevolution.org/twinflames/twinflames.htm

http://temple-of-wisdom.net/soulmates.html

http://www.kktanhp.com/twin_souls.htm

http://www.scribd.com/doc/19286098/-Soul-Mates-and-Twin-Flames-Q-A-with-Elizabeth-Clare-Prophet

http://love.ivillage.com/lnm/0,,LC_7qkjgfr9,00.html



Related Blogs:

http://universalallegory.blogspot.com/ Ancient Teaching: Understanding Twin Souls / Twin Flames
http://heartsseeker22.blogspot.com/ The blog I started to begin my search for understanding intimate relationships
http://inspirationsofhumanity.blogspot.com/ A blog profiling and honoring Human Inspiration
http://heartmatesforever.blogspot.com/ Poetry of Alchemy: A Merging to the SOUL...
http://empathyandpain.blogspot.com/ A blog I started in honor of my mother
http://coreofhumanity.blogspot.com/ Breaking things down so we can talk...

Relationship series (6) Images of Love

I will be expanding this blog to include contemporary as well as historical beliefs and stories about the word love and its various meanings.

For now, I will let this video selection speak for itself and simply mention that the laden power within these two people, i.e., there love for one another is something that I will be talking about in length. For those who have watched the video I placed in one of my earlier links on "brain function" (Relationship blog 2) we can see that the dynamics here are intermixed with many different emotions. My intent will be to elaborate (as a means to greater understanding for myself, and anyone else so interested) on the dynamics within this writing.

Briefly, there are many kinds of so called "love." For me, one of the most incredible illustrations is found within the movie "The Notebook." There are other powerful references as well which I will integrate as I expand the conversation. My ultimate goal will be to categorize and synthesize the dynamics of the subject without tarnishing the "essence" of that which so many people dream about and long for both "in" and "out" of committed relationships...


(in the era of mortal intoxication is one of the lines in the song) Song "Hair Like Snow" by Jay Chou (with subtitles)





Lyrics can be found at: http://www.jay-chou.net/lyrics_view.php?a_id=11&s_id=3


Related Blogs:

http://universalallegory.blogspot.com/ Ancient Teaching: Understanding Twin Souls / Twin Flames
http://heartsseeker22.blogspot.com/ The blog I started to begin my search for understanding intimate relationships
http://inspirationsofhumanity.blogspot.com/ A blog profiling and honoring Human Inspration
http://heartmatesforever.blogspot.com/ Poetry of Alchemy
http://empathyandpain.blogspot.com A blog I started in honor of my mother

Relationship series entry (5) "Understanding Fear, Learning Boundaries and Identifying Healthy Attachement"

Some of the thought processes I am contemplating on as I expand on the content of this entry:

Does/can knowledge stifle or convolute passion?

Can "Love" derived from fear and or need have a purity or an essence, or if it is agreed that it is derived from fear or need, is it then "NOT" Love?

What is Loneliness?

What is Happiness?

In forming the text, there will be considerable dialog used in this writing from Agustine and Aristotle.

Reflection: After being somewhat awakened to the magnitude of "thought" teachers such as Socrates, Plato and Aristotle give us, it is incredible that we do not spend more time learning from them as a collective...



Related Blogs:

http://universalallegory.blogspot.com/ Ancient Teaching: Understanding Twin Souls / Twin Flames
http://heartsseeker22.blogspot.com/ The blog I started to begin my search for understanding intimate relationships
http://inspirationsofhumanity.blogspot.com/ A blog profiling and honoring Human Inspration
http://heartmatesforever.blogspot.com/ Poetry of Alchemy
http://empathyandpain.blogspot.com A blog I started in honor of my mother

Relationship series entry (4) "Knowing "ONE'S" Place in the Continuum of The Relationship Process”

Original Post (Jan 27th 2010) entry number 4 (Relationship Series)


Affirmation of Friendship and Maintaining “Identified” Personal Commitments: “I Give Myself Permission to have“Women” as Friends in My Life!”


Now obviously, this blog is another in my ongoing series of writings having to do with Relationships and Romantic Relationships. In reading this affirmation, there are several presuppositions that are inherent to the successful implementation of articulating its essence! Obviously, for a woman the affirmation can be turned around. My goal here is to present a basis for my belief that burdensome relational wows can be minimized, or eliminated by looking in the mirror instead of looking at our partner as a savior.

As always, the first order of business is continuing to identify what we believe as individuals, and identifying what stage of the building process we are in. In other words, what works for me, may not work for someone else. Along these lines of thought, MY acknowledgment is that I am continuing the manufacturing process of building (discovering) my life. I prayed a prayer some decades ago; acknowledging to myself, with ALL sincerity, “ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THIS TOM, ARE YOU CERTAIN YOU WANT TO PRAY THIS PRAYER?” After considering the alternatives, I said YES, and proceeded to ask my maker: “That on the path of life, “I WOULD BE GIVEN THE PRIVILEGE TO “LEARN MY LESSONS WELL!” Albeit, a historically profitable, and sometimes painful path, my prayer has not gone unanswered, and in fact, this writing is a continuation of the process.

Now the catalyst for the content of this particular writing is connected to my chosen path of incorporating various philosophies and teachings that allow me to navigate a eclectic course of learning and living. Accordingly, Don Miguel Ruiz, and respectively, Gary Zukav have been instrumental in my "life process." Don Miguel Ruiz has two wonderful stories in his book “The Mastery of Love.” One of the stories is about a man and a woman who did not believe in love, and the other is about a “magical kitchen. I won’t spoil the story by trying to tell it here, but simply mention that it has something to do with being in a romantic relationship where two people CAN BE totally HAPPY, ALIVE, WHOLE and at PEACE “TOGETHER” without being burdened down with the negativity that so often comes with social conditioning and psychological / emotional bondage, i.e., suspicion, jealousy, anger, manipulation, deceit, fear, and most tragically, spiritual stagnation, and lack of personal peace!

This is where Gary Zukav comes in. Now remember my current continuum of truth, may not work for you the reader, so before continuing, allow me to ask you to consider how strong the outer defenses of your paradigm are! In other words, everyone is ultimately responsible for their own personal paradigm, and if some new thought should shake a pre-established belief or idea that exposes an Achellies heel, the illumination remains their's to navigate! Now to actually understand the basic message and essence of Gary Zukav’s marvelous teaching, there is a need to know first of all that we are not alone. His philosophy teaches that before our birth (while still in our shall we say, heavenly form) we had a sort of round-table meeting with what he calls our Guides and Teachers. Now if you want to understand the totality of Zukav or “catch up” here, you may want to read two of his books, “Seat of the Soul” and “Heart of the Soul." In these books, the reader is introduced to the Earth School where we learn that those things in life that challenge us, are actually blessings. Where relationships comes into this picture is by accepting the fact that during the round table meeting we had with our Guides and Teachers before we “arrived on the scene”, i.e., before we were born, we had already identified the list of “things to accomplish” in this lifetime.

Belief in Gary Zukav's work is not a prerequisite for understanding his work. His message is POWERFUL! The message is that those things that are difficult in our lives; things, or challenges that are fearful or painful for us to “STAND UP TO EMOTIONALLY” are the things that we chose to work on before we came to be in these bodies. So, if relationships have proven to be challenging or difficult for us as individuals, that could be a cue to look at the dynamics of our respective challenges in regard to what we "came to accomplish!" He asks, what are your vices, what are your fears or addictions, what are your relational difficulties, or the triggers to your outbursts and so on... Who are WE in those quiet moments that no one sees? The "growth opportunity" is ours when we consciously CHOOSE to quit running away from the things that cause (or have caused) us difficulty, and "STAND" WILLING to ..WORK ON US, we are then enrolled in the metaphorical “Earth School” You get the picture…

So where does the affirmation come in? For me, its all part of the process of discovery. I know I am still in the relational "Learning Process", and as most everyone even close to my inner circle already knows, in my past I have looked to the women in my life to make me happy by being my savior, or thinking that somehow they were the key to fixing me! I acknowledge that this historically cyclical course of action was (and is) disrespectful for both parties, and instead of creating a home, it creates seemingly impenetrable emotional walls, and one-way streets! Trying to navigate these streets, I have been the recipient, as well as have been responsible for inflicting emotional pain on those “I HAVE TRULY LOVED”, but now it is time for me to live what I am learning, That is, that “ONLY I CAN MAKE ME HAPPY!” If I am looking to someone else to make me happy, then I am being disrespectful to them and need to stay in EARTH SCHOOL 101! Of course one of the key questions is “how long of a class is this EARTH SCHOOL? And when will I graduate? How can I gauge my progress?

There are actually many classes in the Earth School and we know when we have graduated when things that were once painful in our lifes has been replaced with peace and harmony with the Universe; or from a Christian vernacular, with the love of Christ. So in my Earth School class marked "Relationship 101" my final take-home essay is being written; it is a paper about learning how to build friendships and respecting myself and others. My chosen affirmation of opening myself to having women as "FRIENDS" in my life can be likened to walking through a doorway into a new room, a prism of relational light radiating with the attributes of understanding, and relational "peace." The result I am "acheiving" in this rational approach, with the writing of my "Final Exam" for relationship 101, is projecting myself into the future. A future that incorporates the love of the magical kitchen, friendship, conscious choice, and ultimately a spiritual partnership as is masterfully illustrated in the metaphorical Earth School.

In closing, I want to share two quotes, one from Don Miguel Ruiz's book, The Four Agreements, and the other from Epictetus.

"Find your voice to ask for what you want... The day you stop making assumptions, you will communicate cleanly and clearly" (Don Miguel Ruiz).

"It's much better to die of hunger unhindered by grief and fear than to live affluently beset with worry, dread, suspicion and uncheked desire." (Epictetus aprox 55 A.D.).

Blessings to all, Tom


Related Blogs:

http://universalallegory.blogspot.com/ Ancient Teaching: Understanding Twin Souls / Twin Flames
http://heartsseeker22.blogspot.com/ The blog I started to begin my search for understanding intimate relationships
http://inspirationsofhumanity.blogspot.com/ A blog profiling and honoring Human Inspration
http://heartmatesforever.blogspot.com/ Poetry of Alchemy
http://empathyandpain.blogspot.com A blog I started in honor of my mother

Relationship series entry (3) "Being Real and Living the Truth"

Original Post (Jan 13th 2010) entry number 3 (Relationship Series)

Being Real:
This morning I spent some time in meditation. Now during what I call meditation, my time is sometimes spent sitting quietly (on my little pillow and rug with my 10 or so affirmations taped to the floor) without moving, sometimes reading is my choice, sometimes listening to teaching audio while stretching my leg muscles out on the floor. Sometimes candles and incense quietly burn, sometimes I pray, chant or just concentrate on my breathing with eyes closed or open. Some sessions are 5 minutes long, others are 1-2 hours. Some sessions are emotionally deep, while others seem routine and mundane. My objective in mentioning these things is to be real, and if it be so, help someone to glean a measure of progress in their own life. The phrase, "God Knows" how hard-fought a measure of peace and tranquility has been to implement into my life at age 51 is suitable for the discussion.

My equally important objective is to offer this particular blog as an addition to my series of blogs on relationships and romantic relationships. Of course, the question could be asked, how does talking about your daily routine fall into the category of romance and relationships? My answer: "If one does not have a relationship with oneself, how can that person have a quality relationship with another person?" Spouse, friend, acquaintance or otherwise?

Furthermore, it remains my belief that we have enough strife, jealousy, hate, dissension, misunderstandings, and turmoil in the world already. The history books and many of our own personal histories are filled with the aftermath of these detriments on a scale of both large and small measure. So, if through the process of my own (or someone’s) willingness to be "real" for the purpose of helping shift the current social and global paradigm to a more peaceful equilibrium, then it is a realness I gladly choose to embrace.

Living the Truth:
Now to live the truth in my world, we have to go down a little rabbit hole and identify this word known as TRUTH; more specifically, what TRUTH means for us as individuals. Is truth found in what we believe or what we have been told? Categorically, we could easily make a spread sheet of answers. In some of the categories, we may share the same answers or perhaps we may disagree. Personally, I embrace these differences as I do think it would be a dull world if we were all the same. From a three dimensional "linear" perspective, the very words that I am writing here have been influenced by many building blocks, i.e., physiology, heredity, social conditioning, personal decisions, life-experiences and many others. Now because I was told something or learned something that I currently identify as truth, does that mean that I should believe it? Perhaps!

For me the word "perhaps" represents the level of comfort a person has as an individual. In one of Don Miguel Ruiz's books he talks about the greatest sin being that of a sin against ourselves. Several years ago, I started a research paper with the title, "Riding the Wave of Association.” When completed, the contents of the paper will interact with the pros and cons of a person, or group, deriving part of their identity from a connection with something outside of themselves; hence, riding the wave of association. Now we can easily see that having such a connection to a given group, say a religion or a certain set of beliefs, is a crucial part of the very fabric of society! Indeed a crucial and important role from a macro (large scale) view. Expanding the question; however, from simply asking what truth is, to asking: "Do we know what OUR respective TRUTH is?, may have significant implications on any of our relationships! My challenge therefore is not to change anyone's respective truth, but simply to say that by being comfortable in that respective truth, as it exists for us as individuals is where self respect, honor, and the seeds of personal growth reside.

In the movie "Resurrecting the Champ" one of the characters tells some (so called) white lies to make themselves look better in the eyes of another. In relationships, if we are being true to ourselves (OUR TRUTH as it exists for US), then we are putting ourselves in a position to achieve true harmony with ourselves, and in our relationships.

Blessings, Tom

Related Blogs:

http://universalallegory.blogspot.com/ Ancient Teaching: Understanding Twin Souls / Twin Flames
http://heartsseeker22.blogspot.com/ The blog I started to begin my search for understanding intimate relationships
http://inspirationsofhumanity.blogspot.com/ A blog profiling and honoring Human Inspration
http://heartmatesforever.blogspot.com/ Poetry of Alchemy
http://empathyandpain.blogspot.com A blog I started in honor of my mother

Relationship series entry (2) "Neediness, Jealousy and Possessiveness"

Original Post (Jan 5th 2010) entry number 2 (Relationship Series)

NEEDINESS:

Dependent Personality Disorder:http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LnBzeWNob2xvZ3l0b2RheS5jb20vY29uZGl0aW9ucy9kZXBlbmRlbnQtcGVyc29uYWxpdHktZGlzb3JkZXI=

Abandonment: http://outofthefog.net/CommonBehaviors/FearOfAbandonment.html

How Neediness Damages Relationships: http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3Lmlsb3ZleW91bG92ZW1lLmNvbS9yZWxhdGlvbnNoaXBfYWR2aWNlL0FydGljbGVfSG93X05lZWRpbmVzc19EYW1hZ2VzX1JlbGF0aW9uc2hpcHMuaHRt

CO-Dependent Relationships http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vcHN5Y2hjZW50cmFsLmNvbS9saWJyYXJ5L2lkNjMuaHRtbA==

Abraham Hicks: Neediness atracts Neediness http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LnlvdXR1YmUuY29tL3dhdGNoP3Y9QW05RTdRamNqVFU=

Quote: "If your love has attachement, discrimination, prejudice, or clinging in it, it is not true love" (Thich Nhat Hanh).


JEALOUSY: http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LnBzeWNob2xvZ3l0b2RheS5jb20vYXJ0aWNsZXMvMjAwOTEwL3JvbWFudGljLWplYWxvdXN5http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LnlvdXR1YmUuY29tL3dhdGNoP3Y9RE9NcmlFMWZmQzA=

BOOKS: Overcoming Jealousy and Possessiveness by Paul Hauck


POSSESSIVENESS:

Soulmate Love, and Authentic Egoless Relationship
http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LnBzeWNob2xvZ3l0b2RheS5jb20vYmxvZy9lbmxpZ2h0ZW5lZC1saXZpbmcvMjAwOTA5L3NvdWxtYXRlLWxvdmUtYW5kLWF1dGhlbnRpYy1lZ29sZXNzLXJlbGF0aW9uc2hpcA==

Getting Real: A young adult perspective
http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LnlvdXR1YmUuY29tL3dhdGNoP3Y9eVBRbFhXMjNqUDg=

Additional Resources: Caution: the following video is very infomative on brain function but has graphic imagry!http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LnlvdXR1YmUuY29tL3dhdGNoP3Y9VDduWGlYUWIyaU0=

Thought/Question for the day: "One way to understand ourselves better as a collective could be to increase the percentage of people who...???"

In the muse consider such inventions as ethnocentrism, prejudice, selfishness, inductive vs deductive reasoning, social conditioning, and don't forget to forget being so serious from time to time and have some fun...


Future blogs to include: Fear, abandonment, anger, hate, love, sex, aesthetics, pornography, religion, addiction, forgiveness, altruism, career, money, drugs...



Related Blogs:
http://universalallegory.blogspot.com/ Ancient Teaching: Understanding Twin Souls / Twin Flames
http://heartsseeker22.blogspot.com/ The blog I started to begin my search for understanding intimate relationships
http://inspirationsofhumanity.blogspot.com/ A blog profiling and honoring Human Inspration
http://heartmatesforever.blogspot.com/ Poetry of Alchemy
http://empathyandpain.blogspot.com/ A blog I started in honor of my mother
http://coreofhumanity.blogspot.com/ Breaking things down so we can talk...

Relationship series entry (1) "The Collective Philosophy of Relationships; Where is Your Center?"

(original post Jan 5th 2010 ) Entry number 1 (Relationship Series)

I have titled this entry “The Collective Philosophy of Relationships; Where is YOUR CENTER?” because it speaks to the CORE issues as I see them. Simply, as humans, we all have emotions and engaging and acknowledging them as part of our lives is a big step in finding out where we want to go as individuals. Now imbedded within my chosen wording for this title piece are a multitude of possible arteries, and tributaries of thought. My goal forthcoming is to launch a series of “established” topics of relationship issues, links to web sites ect…

In the process, my direct and indirect “blog goals” will be to continue the sometimes arduous task of building and laying bricks of knowledge, and prayerfully (sometimes painfully), bricks of wisdom, on my personal “Yellow Brick Road of Life.” And if it be so, provide some nugget of knowledge or piece of information that may assist someone else on their respective path; perhaps someone who stumbled here by fate, curiosity, chance, desire, or otherwise…

It should also be noted that the links, books and audio recommendations I provide as resources will be expanded on from time to time. In other words, these blogs as you see them today may have expanded information tomorrow. Along those lines of thought, if you have suggestions and want to engage in the discussion, please post them in your comments so that others can access them.

One of my favorite saying is from Jon Kabat-Zinn: “Use your breath as the string that will guide you through the Labyrinth.” From his most excellent book, “Wherever you go, there you are.”

Blessings,
Tom Odeen

Note: By clicking on any of the links embedded within these blogs, you the reader take full responsibility for viewing its content, Furthermore, you also retain total control over your level of involvement, and control over the multitude of methods you may choose to exercise, as a willing (or otherwise) participant of the "collective" Earth. As a component of this collective, I will try and add one new blog per month while continuing to integrate material that has depth and diversity.







Related Blogs:
http://universalallegory.blogspot.com/ Ancient Teaching: Understanding Twin Souls / Twin Flames
http://heartsseeker22.blogspot.com/ The blog I started to begin my search for understanding intimate relationships
http://inspirationsofhumanity.blogspot.com/ A blog profiling and honoring Human Inspration
http://heartmatesforever.blogspot.com/ Poetry of Alchemy
http://empathyandpain.blogspot.com/ A blog I started in honor of my mother

Seeking and Creating in Life

Notice: This artwork is intended solely for my own personal use and is in no way connected to T3Abstracts and crafts. I do not endorce, authorize, condone or agree to allow this image to be copied, reprinted, sold, or used for any purpose other than being viewed and enjoyed by my visitors. Tom Odeen

Welcome to my blog

Greetings!

My goal in being a bloger is to incorporate my essence (electronic limitations acknowledged), into what my current personal evolution vernacular will call the UNIVERSAL COLLECTIVE. Equally, my goal as part of this collective is to meet new people who have similar interests and goals to shape and shift the current global paradigm to a more peace-loving equilibrium...

Some of the blogs you see here are those I have transferred from myspace to here; I found myspace to be restricting in that they use encryption when a person tries to share a web site or contact information. I found this offensive and non conducive to achieving my efforts, hence I revived this blogspot that I had began some time ago, but never established.Thank you for your contribution...

Sincerely and Many Blessings,

Tom Odeen







Related Blogs:
http://universalallegory.blogspot.com/ Ancient Teaching: Understanding Twin Souls / Twin Flames
http://heartsseeker22.blogspot.com/ The blog I started to begin my search for understanding intimate relationships
http://inspirationsofhumanity.blogspot.com/ A blog profiling and honoring Human Inspration
http://heartmatesforever.blogspot.com/ Poetry of Alchemy
http://empathyandpain.blogspot.com/ A blog I started in honor of my mother